Huge Update

So in the last few months quite a bit has happened :-)...Marty has celebrated many 1st's!

He has celebrated his first Thanksgiving!

He played Baby Jesus in the Church Christmas Eve Service

He celebrated his Christmas!

He tried blueberries for the first time ( I know previous post said he liked blueberries he actually liked strawberries at that time.

He has learned how to sit up on his own

and how to roll over from front to back and back to front!

(Tummy time is way better now!)

On the same day he learned how to sit up by himself, and roll over from his back to his belly he also cut his first tooth...this kid cant just hit one milestone at a time he has to hit multiple ones lol

He is so funny....he coo's and babble's, and if mama is eating he wants whatever food I have...even if he just finished eating 5 min before hand...he wants my food...

He coughs or says abu for my mom...but the rest haven't received their calling cards yet lol

He smacks his lips to get someones attention or to call the dogs over :-)

Dan has really stepped up his game with helping out around here and with Marty and I doubt he has any clue to how much it means to me! If Im trying to get Marty's stuff ready to get out the door, he'll change his diaper and do anything else to make my life easier.

I also think I know what was causing the low sex drive, and migraines, and a whole list of other side effects....Depo....The Depo shot is finally wearing off and I'm on Mireana now, and Ive been having less migranes, and even if my sex drive still isn't where it was, its getting better... definitely should have gone and been switched over sooner....

Dan is still trying to lose weight for the Marine's, and I think at the very least he may join the reserves and be a weekend warrior....which is fine by me....I want him to see Marty as much as possible!

The apt is slowly getting back into working order....I dont know if its the hope of Spring coming early, or if Im finally fully recovered from giving birth, but Im starting to feel lots better 7 months later, and having the energy to get stuff done around here!

Well I believe my little munchkin man may be awake....so lets see whats good for play time!

Life

As much as I love being a Mama, I miss having a life that didnt consist of changing diapers, cleaning up spit up and dealing with tears and not being able to figure out whats going on.....Then again....I do love the fact that as long as I am calm....Marty usually settles right down for me...and if he's sleepy he cuddles right in and goes to sleep. I love his gummy grins, and his squeals (that my mama, thought was hilarious to teach him...and as soon as he's able to understand the word no....or stop...we are getting rid of the high pitch squeals), and when he learns how to do something new....in the last week he has learned how to roll himself over from his belly to his back....reach out for a toy and push it around, and hold his bottle....we're still working on from his back to his belly....but he'll get there! He's also tolerating tummy time even more now that he's learned how to roll over and reach for toys!

That being said....I miss having a sex drive, I miss having time with my friends sans Marty (even though I have horrible separation anxiety), I miss wanting to put an effort into how I look....and I totally miss not being a size 18 which is almost impossible to find and looking for flattering jeans in the plus size section was horrible plus I wanted actual jeans....something that if Dan has to dump the bike, and Im with him will help protect my legs....not shred into a thousand pieces along with my skin. I miss feeling pretty. I dont want to just be Marty's Mama...though I love that title....I'm bored....I want to have more to talk about then my childs loose bowels, and how his diaper rash looks horrible.... I want to get out of the house.

I want to do something just for me....I feel like I give and I give and I give....and I'm drained. I don't feel like I have anything else to give....I don't even feel like I know who I am anymore besides Marty's Mama. I want Marty and my future kids to see me as more as their mother, as someone who has a life outside of taking care of them....My mom tried to that, but I think in the end she put us first so much she lost herself and now that we're both out of the house she doesnt know what to do....and I don't want that...I love my mom very much, and she did the best she could. But I dunno...I want more for myself, as selfish as that may sound....so I have more to talk about with my friends and husband than my child though he's very interesting...it does get old pretty fast...once the newness wears off....

b leh

So Dan wants to go into the marines....I dont want him too....Im trying to be supportive....but him trying to lose weight is being put before our son and myself....and honestly...I wouldn't even care if it weren't for Marty....When Marty gets older what is he going to remember more and what is going to mean more to him....that his daddy went into the military so his family could have benefits...or that his daddy spent time with him...and was there for all the major events in his life? My dad worked hard....but he always made sure he made time for Shannon and I. I feel like Dan's not doing that for Marty....I feel like losing this weight and going into the marines is way more important to him than, spending time bonding with his son. I understand he wants to be able to provide better for Marty and I....but honestly....struggling to get by from week to week, is way better than not having him around at all.

Marty's Story - Baby Photo Book

Marty's Story - Baby Photo Book

Check it out!!!

Alot has been going on....

So alot has been going recently....

Martys 4 months old...

Things Marty can do...

* He smiles

* He "talks"

* He screams and then when you come running grins up a storm because you came to pay attention to him

* He "stands"

* He will lift his head off of the floor durin

g tummy time (still not a huge fan of the tummy time)

* He bats at toys

* He will reach for a grasp for toys when he wants too

* He "walks" when he so choose's to do so

* He is attempting to sit un-supported though it is quite cute when he topples over

Marty eating one of his favorite Foods....Squash!

I love his gummy grin!

Marty has started solids!

Some of his favorites are:

* Mashed Potatoes

* Apple Sauce

* blue berries

* Green beans

* Squash

Now we've tried rice cereal and we are not a fan....so the next grocery store run Ill be picking up oatmeal, and another type of cereal, we've also tried sweat potatoes, and though Marty likes them as of right now the do not like Marty.

Marty adores both set of grandparents, and hi

s uncle and aunts!

Marty was not a fan of Halloween...Though he was adorable as a giraffe he did not like being dressed up one bit!

Save Me Please!

Grandpa I dont like this anymore!!!!

Much Better, I think Ill settle down and watch some TV!

I am so blessed to be Marty's Momma! He's such an awesome baby!

In other news....I found out someone who use to be a friend of mine, is dating an ex of mine....I know a few of my readers are also friends with this person and your going to have your own feelings about this situation, but Im going to share my opinion and would appreciate it if I weren't judged nor caught any shit for it. I could give a damn less that my ex is moving on....good for him. I hope he's happy. But as for this woman, who he is dating, I'm not surprised that they ended up together....her reaction to my pregnancy and marriage definitely make more sense now, considering she was typically the kind waited for an explanation or confronted you if she had a problem....confront me she did...give me a chance to say my piece she did not. I vented about her reaction in a previous blog, I still think she was a bit unreasonable and some of the flack I caught for my venting (especially considering I was still coming to terms myself with the marriage and pregnancy, and I was extremely hormonal which was also stated as a forewarning, I think a little bit of leeway should have been given and understanding instead of being jumped on for not being the worlds greatest friend/girlfriend). That being said, I still can't believe that this woman, after watching the abuse I went through, would date him....it boggles my mind. Granted, I had a lot of issues I was dealing with, and yes...at the END of our relationship, I did cheat, after I figured out HE had to of been CHEATING. I'm not perfect, but that did not excuse his behavior towards me. That did not and still does not excuse, the verbal and emotional abuse he decided to dole out. Why she would think he would or will treat her any differently is beyond me. He has severe mommy issues. She will hurt him somehow, unintentionally, and that will trigger the abuse cycle to begin...oh and he'll apologize and say he loves her, and she'll fall for it. This woman, has lots of potential and deserves so much more than what she will get with him. Because at the end of our relationship he had been cheating for quite some time...and I was oblivious to it, and he will cheat on her and she will get hurt. Right now I'm struggling with how I think I'll react when he does hurt her. I know as a Christian, I am suppose to be there for her to lean on if she does reach out to me. But on the other side, this woman, has hurt me before, and I don't trust her. She made promises to me before, and she broke them. Just as I wasn't a good friend at times to her, she really wasn't a good friend to me when I need her the most. So I guess we'll see when the time comes what will happen.....

Dan and I are doing wonderfully though! His uncle is giving him and old '84 honda motorcycle! It is an awesome bike! My butt fits on it! I love it and cant wait for a nice day for dan and I to go for a ride!

Well that was one heck of a post....

Must try to make this a habit! Marty naps and Momma blogs!

Oct 1st,

So this month for NaBloPo, the them is Play....so I think Im going to try to snap a picture everyday of Marty playing.....

But today I have a video of Marty Playing that I am going to try to share!

SO...

I was pretty frustrated till I talked to my friend Kayhla and realized my husband isnt the only one in the world you have to nag to get things done...or doesnt see things that need to be done...or expects me to work, fix dinner, take care of the baby, and take care of the home....but wants my mom to watch the baby on his day off so he can sleep....oh and Im able to do most of that stuff while Im sick...the only one I didnt do was work because I was pretty miserable and having difficulty breathing the night before... I feel like Kay says it best:

its amzing how their minds work

i dont get it. they want you to be a 2010 working mom, but a 1950's housewife at the same time

just frustrated....because we've been going to this marriage seminar and I feel like all its done is given him permission not to help out unless he's asked to....its like he tuned out the part that said...hey you help out without being asked your more likely to get some....if you take some of the weight off your wife's shoulders, shes less drained and more likely to put out! Not a hard concept...especially if you wanna get lucky...Im more willing to put out if I dont have to nag you to do shit around the apt....seems pretty easy to get....but I guess its not...Ok maybe Im still pretty pissed....but I feel alittle better now...

Martys Birth Story....

So Im going to attempt to write Martys birth story, which begins when I was 31 wks pregnant...

At 31 wks, I started bleeding, why, no one really knows....probably, stress and dehydration...so I was placed on bed rest for 5 days....the worst 5 days ever! If you have never been on bed rest, pray that you are not placed on bed rest....it sucks! after 5 days I hadnt dilated at all, and I was taken off of bed rest...but still on pelvic rest (which means none of the fun stuff...honestly wasnt that fun for me then anyway).

I was still in the dark about my baby shower @ 34 wks (note to any one throwing a baby shower...hold it earlier then that so the Momma to be does not feel like a complete cow and actually has time to wash and put stuff away), when my cousin in law spilled the beans, at the end of the week she would see me at my baby shower and she was so excited! So the night before my baby shower ( a friday) I was sick of being pregnant....like so sick of being pregnant, ( I was going to be released from it on monday, anyway) I broke my pelvic rest for McDonalds (I had been craving it, and with gestational diabetes, you shouldnt have it), the rest of the night I contracted nothing steady, they'd go from 4 min to 8 min to

6 min, to 20 min....so I drank lots of water....oh mind you when I say contractions think of the mildest menstrual cramps youve ever had and those were my contractions....so I could barely sleep the night before my baby shower, I woke up early and I think did stuff around the apt. and made brownies for the mother/daughter lunch that wa

s the cover for my baby shower ( seriously, it was supposedly an event at church, and it wasnt even announced during church...I was kind of on to it before said cousin in law spilled the beans, so I took a dessert to my own babyshower...nice right, 35 wks preggo, baking chocolate brownies that made me nauseated). So what I didnt tell Dan was I was having regular contractions every 15 min, I just thought it was the excitement I was feeling, and was going to make it to that baby shower come hell or high water....

So I go, and while contracting I sit for 2 hrs (maybe ev

en longer) opening presents....I mean, today was the first time I went to go get diapers, and even those were bought with a gift card....I didnt even know half the people there and was very overwhelmed (also another note, if you know the momma to be has anxiety, and the meds she is on level her out, but dont make her, herself...dont invite 60-70 some odd people to the baby shower, especially if she doesnt know most of the people....all the presents were great and greatly needed!...dont get me wrong...just if your going to have that many people there...make sure the momma isnt going to be 35 wks pregnant). So

that night I was beat....and overwhelmed by the mess in my living room....I wanted to start going through stuff cause I wasnt even sure of what I had....but I was soooo tired. So with lots of water, I put myself on bedrest for the rest of the night....

The next day was Fathers Day, I was still pretty tired....but managed to get my butt to church...and then went out to lunch with my parents....I was having contractions but not consistently....so that night we go out to my in laws for a fathers day cookout.....looking back now...Im pretty sure my water broke then...but it was just a trickle, and Id never been through it before...so how was I suppose to know....I thought

I had peed myself....and my contractions really werent different then....so we went home, and I wa

s alittle keyed up for some unknown reason....so I sat down on the floor ( so I didnt have to lean over when I created my piles of clothes, and stuff to return) and I start taking tags off of clothes so I can wash them, and I start making piles of stuff to return....around midnight, I get up and go to the bathroom, and I look at my underwear and its

wet, and it doesnt smell like pee...and its sticky....and Im pretty sure my water broke, so I tell dan Im getting a shower ( cause I figure its going to b

e the last relaxing one for awhile) and while in the shower I have a few contractions that felt harder then the other ones I had been having....so I get out of the shower and go and sit by dan in the dining/computer room....and I just sit there for a good 5 min....meanwhile Dans trying to get me to tell him whats wrong....and so finally I tell him, I think my water broke....and that was it....Dan was out of his chair and getting dressed very quickly....Thankfully after I was allowed off of bedrest I had the sense to pack each of us a bag, so I told Dan where that stuff was, and he grabbed it all, while I grabbed last minute stuff...on th

e way to the hospital Dan called triage to let them know we were on the way....I was lead back to the triage room, and they do the routine, questions, and tell me to change into a gown and pee in a cup.... finally around 1, I was seen and they tested the fluid, and it came back positive for amniotic fluid, and @ 2

am, I was admitted for the long haul....because it wasnt known whether or not I had group b strep I was placed on intravenous antibiotics (which sucked, and burned big time!) I was also given fluids, since I would be given pitocen to help speed up the contractions....and I was still on the fence about an epidural. So Dan and I hunk

ered down, and Dan actually got some sleep, whil

e I tried to nap, but it didnt work, with all the sounds, and being hungry, and nervous, sleep was the last thing I could do...so I watched tv.....

So around 6 or 7 am, Dan calls both sets of parents to let them know Ive been admitted, but not to come up yet cause it doesnt make sense to do so....

At around 10 am, I ask for an epidural...I was having difficulty talking through contractions, and by the wayhave I mentioned how much pitocen sucks! Dan tried to get me to hold his hand through contractions but I was really scared Id break his hand, I was gripping the arm rails that hard. I am told its going to be about an hr before the anesthesiologist will be able to come to my room....which sucked but I could do it....then 10 min later Marty's heart rate dropped, and out of no where theres a ton of nurses and drs telling me to do this and that, and before I know it Im being rolled to the OR. Scariest moment of my life....I was terrified, and no one was explaining what was going on to me just doing stuff to me....oh by the way, being given a catheter with pain medication totally sucks and hurts really bad ....finally one dr grabbed my hand and explained that I felt cold, and was shivering from the medication I was given to stop my contractions and if I relaxed and stopped fighting the shivers the shivers would stop....and he also explained why I was rolled into the OR and that Dan was outside the room waiting to come in....when the dr went to walk away, I clung to his hand because he was the only one to acknowledge me....finally Dan was allowed in, I dont remember what we said to each other, or anything I just remember being so glad that if I was going to have to have a csection, that he was going to be able to see our baby being born.

Finally they tell us his heart rate had returned to normal and that I would be going back to my room and getting my epidural sooner than I thought. Sitting upright with a catheter....hurts really bad...the epidural itself...was so awesome....I was able to sleep a bit...my parents came up, as did Dan's, and a few other family members. I did have to have the epidural backed off a bit because I hated not being able to move my legs myself....so Dan and I passed the time by sleeping (Dan by eating), watching tv, watching shows on my brother in laws laptop, and by chatting with people on facebook.

So I was at 3 cm, at that point, and was there for a long time, I think around 6 I was finally 4 centimeters.

Around 8pm, I start feeling window pain, and its unbearable, so I am checked and finally at 6 centimeters, I teared up so grateful to be making progress. So I am told, you could be at 6 centimeters for awhile or you could go quickly...well t

here was no way I was going to be suffering with window pain if I was going to be at 6 centimeters for a while. So the anesthesiologist, comes in, and I sit up...not as painful this time....and the catheter for the epidural is re-threaded, and Im given more medication...and then I lay back down....my nurse starts taking my vitals, and all of a sudden I feel like I need to poop, I tell her this and she asks if I need to push and I said "I dunno, I feel like if you put a bed pan under me and I pushed Id poop....so she got the dr in and in the 20 min-30 min it took for the epidural, I went to 10 while sitting up....So NICU made its way to the room, and Dans dad was there talking with them, and I was told to start pushing....really wasnt that bad.... of course I couldnt feel anything and couldnt move my legs on my own....3 pushes per

contraction 5 contractions later, Marty was born. Of course I dont cry how beautiful he is...I cry he has big hands and feet...and how he's going to be a football player....so Dan cut the cord, and Marty was whisked away to the isolet...

The first person to hold Marty (besides the dr) was my mom....which I wasnt too happy about...I hadnt even had a chance to hold him yet....but as soon as she found out, she brought him over to me...he was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen!

Overall I was in the hospital for 4 days, labor and healing time....Marty stayed an extra day....which is a story for another day....I was heartbroken, and lost to say the least....but now hes a healthy, happy soon to be 3 month old!

July NaBloPoMo

Alrighty, so I wasnt able to finish out June for NaBloPoMo for a very special reason...I gave birth to my son, Martin Henry Artes....on June 21, 2010 @ 8:47 pm. he was 5lbs 12 oz and 19 1/4 inches long.

Marty's first night home

Another time Ill actually sit down and write out his birth story...its not like Im bound to forget it lol.

So todays writing prompt is....What's your favorite movie?

My favorite movie is Sleeping Beauty...I know it sounds childish....but I use to throw temper tantrums over this movie when I was 2 yrs old....I dunno...I could watch it over and over again :-)

NaBloPo Day 9

I still have 10 min to answer this lol

Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Japanese lore suggests that if you fold 1,000 paper cranes, your wish will come true. What would your wish be, and what would you be willing to do 1,000 times to get it?

Im not sure...what I would wish for....how about that my husbands lawsuit would work out in our favor.....and I would wash dishes 1,000 times by hand...( I hate doing dishes by hand btw)

NaBloPo Day 8

You've just been given a million dollars. You are not allowed to keep it or give it to anyone you know personally. What do you do with it and why?

I would give it to several charities....part would go to the breast cancer foundation, because I know many survivors of this disease, and I know many people who have passed away because of it....

I would also give some to the Autism Speaks Foundation, because I know several people with autism and more people need to be educated about this disability.

I would also give some to Teach for America....because I am a teacher, and there are many good people who go through this program and help America's inner city youth.

NaBloPo Day 7

Monday, June 7, 2010
Do you owe an apology to anyone? Why?

I owe my little sister an apology because I posted on facebook about my grandmother before anyone had a chance to call her in Africa...and it was very thoughtless for me to post it....

NaBloPo Day 6

So theres not a prompt for today so another update....Marty's room is cleaned up and in the process I found Dan's chaps, so when he rides he can protect his legs now.....so now I need to type up the club minutes....clean out the fridge, do dishes, and tackle the living room closet....and somewhere in there I need to study....so we shall see how this all goes!

NaBloPo Day 5

Well theres not a writing prompt for today...so I guess Ill give a run down of whats been going on....

Since off of bed rest I have been cleaning like crazy....nesting as some would call it....the apartment can not be clean enough....I finally got our room in order and next is Marty's room....then back to tackle the living room and get it looking decent once more....Dan has been wonderful even if Ive been moodier then usual....I just get frustrated so easily...because I want it all done now! I do work in short bursts of 15 min, then rest for 15 min...and slow and steady will win the race....but its annoying when it takes 3 days to completely clean one room...and that doesn't even include vacuuming...so right now Dans doing dishes and Im about to tackle Baby Marty's room!

NaBloPo Day 4

Friday, June 4, 2010
What's the first thing that pops into your mind when you think of your father?

The first thing that pops into my mind is softball....I know it sounds silly but it is....when I was very little on Sunday's my daddy played on the Highland Town Post Office Softball team...and occasionally my mom would take us to watch him play and to play with the other kids....Also softball is how my dad and I bonded as I got older.....he would practice catching and throwing with me and as I got good at that we switched to batting practice at the Stansbury batting cages.....he always encouraged me and would talk with me about what went well in the game and what I needed to work on....it was def. our time together.....

NaBloPoMo Day 3

Thursday, June 3, 2010
Define "freedom."

Freedom....thats a loaded statement....but for me it means to live in a country where not everyone has the same opinion and that is alright. It also means with in the law that I am able to do pretty much what I please.

NaBloPo Day 2

Writing Prompt for Wednesday, June 2, 2010

What's your favorite poem? (And if you don't have one, why?)

A Boy Named Sue by Shel Silverstein

Well, my daddy left home when I was three,
and he didn't leave much to Ma and me,
just this old guitar and a bottle of booze.
Now I don't blame him because he run and hid,
but the meanest thing that he ever did was
before he left he went and named me Sue.

Well, he must have thought it was quite a joke,
and it got lots of laughs from a lot of folks,
it seems I had to fight my whole life through.
Some gal would giggle and I'd get red
and some guy would laugh and I'd bust his head,
I tell you, life ain't easy for a boy named Sue.

Well, I grew up quick and I grew up mean.
My fist got hard and my wits got keen.
Roamed from town to town to hide my shame,
but I made me a vow to the moon and the stars,
I'd search the honky tonks and bars and kill
that man that gave me that awful name.

But it was Gatlinburg in mid July and I had
just hit town and my throat was dry.
I'd thought i'd stop and have myself a brew.
At an old saloon in a street of mud
and at a table dealing stud sat the dirty,
mangy dog that named me Sue.

Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
from a worn-out picture that my mother had
and I knew the scar on his cheek and his evil eye.
He was big and bent and gray and old
and I looked at him and my blood ran cold,
and I said, "My name is Sue. How do you do?
Now you're gonna die." Yeah, that's what I told him.

Well, I hit him right between the eyes and he went down
but to my surprise he came up with a knife
and cut off a piece of my ear. But I busted a chair
right across his teeth. And we crashed through
the wall and into the street kicking and a-gouging
in the mud and the blood and the beer.

I tell you I've fought tougher men but I really can't remember when.
He kicked like a mule and bit like a crocodile.
I heard him laughin' and then I heard him cussin',
he went for his gun and I pulled mine first.
He stood there looking at me and I saw him smile.

And he said, "Son, this world is rough and if
a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
and I knew I wouldn't be there to help you along.
So I gave you that name and I said 'Goodbye'.
I knew you'd have to get tough or die. And it's
that name that helped to make you strong."

Yeah, he said, "Now you have just fought one
helluva fight, and I know you hate me and you've
got the right to kill me now and I wouldn't blame you
if you do. But you ought to thank me
before I die for the gravel in your guts and the spit
in your eye because I'm the nut that named you Sue."
Yeah, what could I do? What could I do?

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun,
called him pa and he called me a son,
and I came away with a different point of view
and I think about him now and then.
Every time I tried, every time I win and if I
ever have a son I think I am gonna name him
Bill or George - anything but Sue.

Well I am just a fan of Shel Silverstein in general because his poems are easy and fun to teach in the class room....but this one is a favorite because Johnny Cash actually sang it and until today I was not aware that Shel Silverstein had wrote it. I looked it up in several places just to be sure.

In other news, I am slowly regaining my strength. Today I have already made the bed and cleaned up the bathroom, and gotten dressed! So now I must tackle the dishes....then I think my and Dans bedroom, then Marty's room....I promise to take plenty of breaks! I just gotta get some stuff done while I'm allowed!

NaBloPoMo Day 1

Im going to try Posting everyday for a month again....This months Topic is NOW....but they're giving writing prompts which is helpful too!!!

Writing Prompt for Tuesday, June 1, 2010

When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

When I was little I wanted to be a lot of things....The main thing I wanted to be was a nurse because I had been very sick as a baby and had heard wonderful stories about my nurses...I quickly found out I did not have a head for numbers or science....I then wanted to be a Naval Aviator and Fly F-22's because I had watched Top Gun one too many times but soon found out that would not be a possibility because I am near sighted and need glasses to see distances.....I then wanted to be a Marine Biologist,so I could train Dolphins or Orca Whales, again...science and math are not my friends.....Eventually I decided that being a teacher is what I was suppose to be....I interact well with children...even better then I do adults....and I enjoy teaching others!

an explanation of everything....

So for the bed rest...Marty tried to make an appearance early on Thursday.....I started to bleed...went by ambulance to Franklin Square Womens Pavilion, evidently I was having contractions....which I didn't feel until the bleeding had started...but his heart rate was good and he was very active through out the whole ordeal....they aren't entirely sure what started the bleeding or contractions....and it could have been any number of things....dehydration, stress, or I could have been contracting and not feeling it and the bleeding was caused by that...so Im on bed rest till at the very least Tuesday...and as long as nothing has changed Im allowed to go on short trips out...or to someone else's house for a change of scenery....but no working or long walks....so we shall see...the spotting I have had since Thursday has all been dark brown which is indicative of dried blood...so no worries there...and Ive had very little cramping since as well...I do have gestational diabetes...which is being controlled by my diet....and I started an antidepressant which has been a huge help! I'm still up set with my sister....I love her very much...but after all the crap she put me through and how much she had been saying shes sad she wont be here for Marty's birth, then for her to not be coming back till March 2012 is a little insane...Maybe Im being selfish but its ridiculous....oh well gotta go cya!

I also forgot to add

for now Im on bedrest...and Ive been put on 25mg of zoloft which has been a huge help so far!