I feel....

like I live in a prison....I mean, I have to ask for permission to stay out late, or to even go to the hospital when several of the club brothers got into an accident and were taken to an out of state hosptial....Now its not even about my safety, its about the control....I know it is...and its crap....no I do not have a full time job but I am being paid $11 an hour which is more than what I would be paid working full time in retail...if I were even able to work full time in retail....no I dont do shit around the house because I dont see them on Princess Shannons case about anything.....Im tired of being crapped on by them.... Im tired of Shannon getting everything she wants....and them treating me like the black sheep....Im tired of only my faults being recognised by them and not my successes....like graduating.... I graduated....more than what they accomplished more than what shannon has accomplished...and nope...shannon is perfect and cassie fucks up all the time....yes, I know Im having a pity party right now....ok....Im gonna go...bye,

Just to let everyone know...

I am still alive I got the job at celebree and I start tomorrow morning! YAY! ok ill update some other time Im exhausted night!

FLipping out and wasting time....

SO I got the interview with Celebree...and one days notice to prepare for it....AHHHHH!!!! So I have a partial portfolio to rebuild, and trying to find something that looks business casual to wear....cause lord knows all my dress clothes are still pack away!Here's hoping and praying I get the job!

I keep....

putting in applications and I finally got an email back from one of them....this place is further than what I would want to travel so hopefully there is something closer to home with this company...and it is education related....hopefully when I call tomorrow it will all pan out! I really hope it does! I really need it too!

No matter....

...What I do...Ill be wrong. Its a lesson I learned before moving in with Bobby...and I am once again being reminded of it. I was pretty much told that I couldn't stay at Dan's parents house because my parents relationship is bad right now or suffering because of me.... ARE YOU KIDDING ME! I was guilted into doing what they wanted me to do once before....and look where it got them...if your relationship sucks...that's not my fault....that is on you and him....grow up, be an adult, and figure it out. Blaming your children for your own relationship issues is inexcussable and unbelievable.


...and people wonder why Im on Anti-depressants and need counseling....ARGH!

Excited!

So I found out that CCBC Essex is desperate for Adjuncts, and I'm going to call whoever I need to tomorrow in order to get a position teaching there....I need a job! Things have been rocky with my parents to the point my father threatened to kick me out of the house....among other things...so that has me stressed.

Dan is recovering well...he is getting around fairly decently only using his walker or wheel chair when we leave the house for long periods of time. He has also begun to drive. He has purchased and Tagged a new bike, and after he receives his disability later this week plans to tag and insure the car his father bought for him. He began out patient therapy today, and as for today things went well.

We have been discussing just having a small ceremony, or going to the court house. Yeah the dress and all that stuff is nice...but we can also save that same money and put a down payment on a house or to rent our own place. This ceremony or court house date may occur sooner rather than later due to the situation with my parents. I want to marry Dan anyway, regardless of the situation with my parents....so why not sooner?

Speaking of the court house, Dan received a court summons, regarding the accident, and it is at the end of September, which is rather soon, so I am very impressed with the city with that.

Still no sign of my fingerprinting card....even though I got the government papers saying nothing was found...so we shall see. School starts next week, so hopefully Ill get my card soon so I can mail everything in.

Lastly....A close up of the beautiful ring Dan gave me when he proposed! Love it and him!

Dan....

Proposed....and I said yes! Right now, our tentative date is sometime Summer 2011. This is for many reasons, 1) to save up money to pay for a wedding (which are expensive) and 2) so my sister can be present, and one of my bridesmaids at the wedding!

I decided against going to the Ukraine, I have many reasons for deciding not too, none of them involving the fact that Dan proposed the day after I applied to.

Any way Im beat....so I will post pics at another time!