10 things you may or may not know or may nto want to know about me....

Im stealing this from Dawnie! Though my life is no where near as interesting as hers has been....

10. As an infant I turned 2 months old in the hospital, I had bacterial spinal menagitis. To drs and my family, I am a mircale child, because for being so little I should not have survived. My parents were and still are realitively over protective of me because of this....and until recently I did not understand why. After I healed from that, I havent had an IV in me until this past recent hosptial visit.

9. During my senior year of high school I was a cheerleader for the winter season. Which was always ironic to me and my family because I always made fun of cheerleaders....needless to say...when college is on the line youll try just about anything to get the scholarships. I also played on the badmittion team....my best friend at the time and I were actually pretty good.

8. I like to cross-stitch, especially when Im feeling anxious because it gives my mind something to focus on other than the fact I cant seem to calm down.

7. I can cook, I dont always like or want to though. My husband recently said he married me under false pretenses because I always claimed that I couldnt....well, to be honest I never realised I could until I started....and for the most part most of what I make turns out pretty good...even though I only know a few easy recipes...

6. Ive struggled with my weight and self esteem for most of my life. In high school, I was probably boardline anorxic, I would only eat dinner because we ate as a family and my parents would realise something was up if I didnt eat. I thought I was fat and over weight for my height and age at the time, though looking back on those pictures I wish I could go back to being that tiny again. Once this little guy makes his appearance I am going to bust my butt ti get back into shape...this time without starving myself. As far as my selfesteem goes, I put on a pretty good front for my friends, but as I look back I realised had I had the high self esteem I thought I had, or wanted my friends and family to think I had I never would have stayed with the asshole for as long as I did...My husband has helped and still works to help me see my self worth.

5. Speaking of the asshole, another reason why I stayed with him for as long as I did was because I felt I had no where to go. The month before he kicked me out, I finally started putting together a plan to get out of that unhealthly relationship, with the help of my husband. I realise now all I had to do was to go back to my parents and apologize....but I did not see that then.

4. I have a hard time trusting people and my instincts. Alot of this stems from friend choices Ive made, and instead of standing up for myself Ive allowed them to walk all over me. Recently Ive begun to trust myself again, and to stand up for myself. I know I may not always be the best friend a person could have, but I usually do my best and if I feel Ive been slighted, I try to talk it out with the person first.

3. My best friend and I did not start out on the best of terms, lol. When Aimee and I met it was like mixing oil and water. After having the same guy break our hearts at seperate times, I got over myself and apologised for being a bitch towards her, and we hit off...whats funny is our friend Kayhla also dated this same guy and now the 3 of us girls are all very close friends.

2. My best friend from childhood, Jen, and I lost contact with each our jr year of high school, mainly because I ratted her out to her parents that she was dating a guy that she had been forbidden to date, in an effort to distract my parents from punishing me for a seperate offense(which didnt work)...Our freshman year of college I wrote her a letter apologizing for that, and we began working on becoming friends again.

1. Alcoholism runs on my fathers side of the family. For this reason and this reason alone, I am very careful about my alcohol consumption, though on occassion I drink alittle too much, I generally just want to be left alone so I can sleep. My father, though I dont believe he was an alcoholic, when I was little he was an angry drinker. The last time he's every hit me, I was 12 and he left a bruise on my leg....he's never hit me since, and my mom took me and my sister and left overnight and went to a hotel. When we came back he seemed to snap out of it, and did not drink for a very long time.


and thats 10 things about me.....though I had struggle with stuff you may not have known about me lol.....