Puzzled.....

Soooo Great news on the graduation home front. I can take the class I need during mini-mester this winter and leave Towson with a letter stating that I have met the requirements for graduation and am qualified to teach elementary school and I will officially receive my degree in May 2009. Which is exciting and scary! But after this past Friday definitely more exciting. I had a substitute for most of the day as my supervising teacher and was able to manage the class without any trouble taught my lessons it all went beatifully and was exactly what I needed to boost my confidence!

But Im puzzled at the same time....once again I see friends and even family having babies and I think...that could have been me. If I hadnt broken up with Bobby when I had 4 years ago...we'd be married and probably would have a kid or kids of our own. Theres a part of me thats glad that we didnt because theres a very good chance I would not be anywhere near graduating but than at the same time....I want a family of my own....yeah borrowing other peoples kids is nice and I get my baby fix.....but then it makes me want to have my own family even more. I long for a little one to fill my arms....to have the sleepless nights, and getting to see all the firsts....I want to know what its like to have a baby growing inside of me, to feel it move, to kick, to hiccup. I know by waiting Ill value my family even more but I ache for little ones to be running around my house....driving me up a wall. I dunno....Well its time for a shower and to get lesson planning done for the week....Ill write more later!